Sunday, April 17, 2005

Knots and Gossip

We sit on the bed on a Tuesday night watching “Extra” or “Hard Copy” or some other such tripe. As is typical G____ fashion, she turns to me and asks (in reference to some model or actress), “Don't you think she's fat?” However, as is usually the case with G___it's not a question but a statement. No, not a statement, but a fact. Like a trained circus monkey, or a Pavlovian dog conditioned to respond, I mutter “Yeah, she's not really that good looking. She's overrated.” Satisfied with my response G___ turns back to the T.V and the obsessive-compulsive twisting of her hair into knots: she calls them “horns.” Upon crafting one of these unique creations she'll proudly ask me to inspect her form. I set down my book, and with the best of intentions I lightly feel her clever invention. “Wow that's really tight” I bemusedly say, loving the way her eyes light up and her nipples sway under my white cotton tank top she's barely wearing. So there we sit on a Tuesday night, G___ endlessly twists, and casually picks at leftover ham fried rice, all the while filling me in, as I read my book (probably Byron), on who's feuding and/or suing and/or screwing who in Hollywood.

9 comments:

Scribe Called Steff said...

Sometimes this living alone thing wears thin.

I'd like the fodder I have from writing about people constantly around me.

But then I'd have to deal with them being constantly around me.

And I kind of like that not being the case.

So maybe I'll make do with my own strange stories that keep me (and my inner pervert) entertained come 3 in the morning.

But rent would be cheaper, too, and that'd be a plus. I could call it a "psyche-invasion tax" or something.

I think I need coffee. Good morning!

Scribe Called Steff said...

(www.thelastditch.blogspot.com)

What? I said I needed coffee, right?

Hermes said...

Steff, I try to make do with the materials I'm given. However I think if I had a muse such as "Gay boy" around me 24/7 I'd be inspired to literally write volumes and volumes of fact and fiction.

To be completely frank with you, and this is completely true, I'll sometimes surround myself with fools. It makes life so much more interesting, and inspires me to type out my thoughts, on this uninteresting blog.

Hermes said...

Steve, I appreciate the sentiment. Although I have to disagree, my writing is more of a mish mash of recycled thoughts and ideas from minds far greater and more original and more creative than mine.

But then again, isn't this the case with all writing? Who ever actually has a truly original idea they can claim they invented? Nobody, that's who. It's more of a race to see who can capture it on paper and publish first.

Scribe Called Steff said...

Well, I have to say, I'm every bit as interesting as GayBoy or he'd have ditched me long ago. ;) I'll write more about us.

I can understand surrounding yourself with fools. I could be doing that, but I hate being around idiocy and I think I deserve better. I'd rather hang alone and make myself laugh out loud than deal with people who are

LESSER THAN ME.

Mouahaha.

I'm joking about the lesser than me thing, but I hate plastic people, ill-informed people, or rude people, and it keeps the list of quality companions short, I'm afraid.

www.thelastditch.blogspot.com

Man, I wish my profile worked so I didn't have to do that shit.

LeeLoreya said...

(scribe called steff, It's actually nice, you look like a neurotic maniac doing that.)

http://leeloreya.blogspot.com

Hey hermes, may I meet Nobody, he seems like a fascinating fellow.

http://leeloreya.blogspot.com

oh and by the way

http://leeloreya.blogspot.com

;)

RuKsaK said...

Yes Hermes - why haven't I linked you yet? I'll get on the case right away as this is bloody good writing.

Scribe Called Steff said...

Well, I'm sort of a neurotic maniac, so that's nice.

Yo, Hermes-- you rock. Thanks for the link.

Hermes said...

LeeLoreya. I'd like to meet nobody myself and ask her how she does it. Lock her in a dimly lit room an pick her brain for an hour or two. I'd be sure to take scrupulous notes and fill you all in on my findings.

Steff. Let me let you in on a little secret, we're all neurotic. You, moreso however. ;)

Ruksak. Coming from you that is a great compliment, thanks. I appreciate it.