It’s strange but I think I’ve met you all over again. A very young you - a twenty-year old version of you to be exact. She is untouched and undefiled by time, drugs, heartbreak, pain. She has the same crooked smile as you and the same stubbornness. She lovingly gazes at me with large serene black eyes filled with curiosity. I look at her in the setting half-light as we lie alone in her room – I examine every inch of her, my Lolita… my Delores Haze - and all I see is you reclining with one arm raised looking back at me. She is the surviving embodiment of you. She is a living, breathing ghost.
I showed her picture to several friends of mine and they all agree it is you. Albeit a younger version of you… age twenty to be exact. My newest sweetheart. The likeness is striking – olive skin, black hair, big black eyes, an exotic nose. I told my friend J_____ that I saved a brush filled with your hair and I had you cloned like the Dinosaurs in Jurassic Park. So that would, in essence, make her a living fossil from my distant past… that I have barely met. And I’m sure that makes no sense. But in my warped world it makes perfect sense.
I’m not sure if this can work as I have erected walls and I refuse to let anyone in… but she’s certainly making a bid. And she’s helping me rid myself of the remaining demons that reside here in my head. I don’t know if it’s worth mentioning but last week she saw a picture of my small son and I and she fell instantly in love. However I know if I were to run into you you’d embrace my son as yours too. I know if you were to look at him you would see the child we were always meant to have. And I know your eyes would fill up with tears, and then inevitably so would mine.
But we didn’t make it did we R_____?
Maybe in the next life we may start all over again as I am starting all over again now.
2 comments:
unfinished business usually comes around. i m just not sure, whether it will be the exact same people or whether there are substitutes that fulfil that very same purpose.
for me, my gypsy prince... he definetely finished some business i had with my first lost love. but maybe that was just wishful thinking, a lingering dream, because reality keeps catching up with me. and it is nasty. shit. take a shower stupid reality.
(excuse my expressions ...i m obviously too much around five year olds lol)
Been a while, man.
This one tore at my heart a bit. Maybe it's because I finally have a child of my own or because...Ahh, who knows, eh?
I enjoyed that bit about the living fossil. I think it was my favorite part. I think that if I saw only the words "living fossil" that I would enjoy that almost as much as the entire post/story.
You remember me. I was Aydreeyin Oneiric and Aydreeyin and many others, but now I am just Adrian.
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